The Wasteland Reviewer

Borderlands (2024) Written Review

Did we break the video game movie adaptation curse yet? With the likes of The Last of Us delivering impressive quality over on HBO, we finally realized what a great video game adaptation could be. But that does not mean the time of bad video game movies adaptations is over. There have been so many terrible adaptations to count which gets every video game fan a bit worried whenever a new venture is announced. Borderlands is a beloved series with its hyper violence, dystopian feel, and overall raunchy nature. Lionsgate released Eli Roth’s version, and it is missing in all those things…as well as in quality. 

What is the biggest problem going for Borderlands here? The script is an absolute nightmare. There are little elements that amount to anything special. First off, the dialogue is atrocious. This sounds like the laziest person (or artificial intelligence) wrote this clunky and plodding script. Not a single character feels authentic and fleshed out. Honestly, most of the characters are lucky to even have one dimension let alone three dimensions. Game favorites like Roland are basically not characters that add nothing to the film. The characters are tricky because they all have observable negative traits but most of the film our city is a trash can. The story is so muddled with plot elements that you would be able to show off if you could make sense of it all. Riddled with conveniences and illogical beats, this film has turned into that dumb franchise without much redeemable. The exposition also makes up what feels like 95% of the dialogue and that never really amounts to much either. 

Does Roth deliver much behind the camera? This film (as the story goes) was really warped in post to create a more family friendly venture instead of the hard R-rated film that he would have wanted. But just looking at what we got…it was not much at all. The pacing is awful with half of the film feeling over edited and rushed and the second half feels downright boring at times and a huge slog. The effects are downright awful at times with shots that look like you booted up a PlayStation 2. There are some moments that feel like they have some fun action but much of the hand-to-hand combat is over-edited to its detriment and the big effects driven moments feel diminished by bad effects. The film can be watchable for the most part, but the combination of messy filmmaking and poor writing makes it hard. 

How about this talented cast? Cate Blanchett just feels a bit off in this leading role as the “badass” bounty hunter Lilith. The writing is so inconsistent with hers that it was certainly a struggle for Blanchett to make this character work and feel likable. They force a Ripley/Newt relationship between Blanchett and Ariana Greenblatt’s Tiny Tina, but it just doesn’t work. There is not enough effort given to flesh out the relationship to make the emotional beats hit. Greenblatt shows off some chops in those moments, but they feel hollow without the appropriate build up. Kevin Hart is a nothing addition to this cast as Roland feels so uninteresting and never makes a real impact. Jamie Lee Curtis is having a blast as Tannis with her quirky turn. Florian Munteanu works fine with the physicality of the mountainous Krieg, but his constant yelling is a lot. Then there is Jack Black as Claptrap. He delivers the energy and annoyance that the role requests and he is by far the most effective of the main cast. That leaves a whole bunch of unamusing and flat antagonists led by the wholly wasted Edgar Ramirez.

 Is Borderlands that bad? To be honest…yes. This is not enough to make you angry (unless you are a huge fan of the game and are let down horribly by this inert adaptation). But it can be quite boring and unenthusiastic which makes it a negative cinematic experience for sure. The big cast is mostly wasted as was the huge budget that Lionsgate threw at this project. The curse still exists but hopefully not too many video game adaptations of this quality are waiting down the pipeline.